And So It Begins

It’s a second successive season started away from home for Mossley as we make the “shorter than it seems” trip to our old friends at Clitheroe. So, a nice easy one to be getting off with then!

During the very early stages of last season it looked as though Clitheroe would be one of the teams that made up the small group of relegation dog fighters all leagues are legally obliged to have each year.

When Mossley arrived at Shawbridge in October the home side had only three points to their name and were still searching for their first win of the season. Two hours, one change of referee and one prolonged “zone out” session from Mossley later they had it; two late goals securing a 3 - 2 victory in a game the Lilywhites had never looked like losing until the man in the middle picked up an injury that necessitated a 25 minute stoppage.

It didn’t seem it at the time but in hindsight I think that for myself, and a few others too, it was this game that was the turning point in our season. The optimism that had been slowly generated over the summer was suddenly replaced by the realisation that the Mr Hyde side to our character was far more dominant than the Dr Jekyll side.

Everything that was to haunt us for the rest of the season was evident in this one match: the slipshod defending, the lack of focus, fitness and changes when they needed to be made. I could go into further detail about what happened but you’re probably better off just re-reading the match report for yourself.

That’s all in the past though and with our new fitness/training regimen I can’t see the team this year, should lightning strike twice, standing around idly for all but the final three minutes of a 25 minute stoppage.

Lining up for Clitheroe against us should be ex-Lilywhites Joel Pilkington, Jonathan Smith and Danny Toronczack so it's almost a certainty that at least one of them will score against us, the unwritten rules of football being what they are. The question is as to whether we can outscore them.

While the performances in pre-season have ranged from good to excellent, this is going to be one hell of a tough game for what is essentially a brand new side. As long as we made a good fist of it though I expect that the visitors on the terraces will return home happy.

Then again, with the amount of drink that's likely to be consumed between entering Mossley Station in the morning and leaving it on the return home at night, merriness, no matter what happens, is practically guaranteed.

Great (Or Not So Great) Expectations

Throughout the friendlies literally no-one has come up to me and asked who I thought would be challenging for honours and who’d be fighting against the drop in the Unibond First Division North this season.

It's a situation I'm happy about though as not only do I hate making predictions, I'm useless at them as well. Sat at work with nothing to do though I began to think about how Mossley would do in the upcoming campaign and as a consequence, how the other teams would fare.

I started to jot down whereabouts in the league I thought teams will be come April and within the space of a minute or two (admittedly not that much thought went into) I had the following list. Instead of pinpointing actual finishing positions, which is a bit too anally retentive, I’ve split the league into five categories.

Please note that the order in which the teams appear in each category is completely random

Promotion contenders:
Durham City, Halifax Town, Skelmersdale United, Colwyn Bay, Clitheroe, Trafford

Near missers:
Curzon Ashton, Newcastle Blue Star, Bamber Bridge

Mid-tablers:
Lancaster City, Ossett Albion, Wakefield, Chorley

Safely unrelegated:
Garforth Town, Harrogate Railway Athletic, Rossendale United, Woodley Sports

Rock bottom:
Radcliffe Borough, Warrington Town, Salford City

The eagle-eyed amongst you will notice that one team is missing.

Where you think the Lilywhites will finish is a question of how -istic you want to be.

If you were optimistic you'd probably see Mossley placed in the promotion contenders/near-missers groupings come the end of the season. The performances in the home friendlies against Stalybridge, Droylsden, and Hyde certainly suggest that we could do well in the league. However, as we're not in the Blue Square North we'll have to adjust our sights accordingly.

Being pessimistic you'll more than likely Mossley finishing in the rock bottom section. And if you were being Stylistic you'd do a little shuffle dance and expect them to make you feel brand new.

Sadly you have to be realistic and being just that I think we're more likely to be closer to the pessimistic outlook than the optimistic one. That's not to say I think we'll be fighting a relegation battle, far from it. I hope we do go on to surprise a lot of people this year but I believe we'll finish in the bottom half of the table, a safe distance away from the relegation dogfight taking place beneath us; a situation which will be a vast improvement on last season.

And to be honest I believe that even the tiniest improvements in league positions is something the majority of supporters would be happy to see. Finishing the campaign one place above where we ended up last year might not be particularly ambitious but if it was achieved, it will be the first step forward the club has made on the pitch for three years. From tiny acorns, etc.

That said a cup run would be nice, even it's only in the Manchester Premier Cup.

Whatever happens though I wish everyone associated with Mossley AFC all the best over the coming eight and a half months. And in regards to the players and management...


So this is it everyone.

Remove all loose clothing, make sure that all straps and guard rails are securely fastened and keep your hands in the car at all times. But most of all, enjoy the latest run around the track on the white knuckle ride that is Mossley AFC.

Dukinfield Town 0 - 4 Mossley

Another goal for Michael Fish and another hat-trick for Danny Egan ensured that Mossley finished their pre-season campaign with another win.

And sadly that's as in-depth as the match report gets.

I was fully intending do a proper report, with maybe a video clip and a picture thrown in as well, but non-stop rain between 10:00 am and 2:00pm, the time I was due to set off to the game, put a stop to that.

Normally a prolonged spell of precipitation wouldn't stop me from attending a match but the lack of any kind of cover at Dukinfield's Blocksages ground brought unpleasant memories of last seasons FA Cup match at Cheadle flooding back (flooding being an incredibly apt verb considering the amount of water that fell from the sky that afternoon). Not about the game itself, though it was bad, but the incredibly painful backache in the hours and days afterwards brought about by the dampness.

Therefore the prospect of spending two hours stood in the pouring rain, and the forty eight after it being unable to stand up straight without some industrial strength medication, wasn't a particularly inviting one. Hence the non-attendance.

Hopefully the match was a good one. A 4-0 score line suggests it was, at least for the Lilywhites, and this result in combination with those from the other friendlies does give some cause for optimism ahead of the start of the season proper.

However, as optimism and Mossley go together like oil and water, history suggests not having any is probably the best course of action to take.

Anyway, fingers crossed, touch wood, etc. for the coming eight and a half months.

Chip Wrappers: 08/08/08

The football season hasn't even started yet but the local papers (well, one of them) have all ready hit the ground running.

From this weeks Reporter (07/08/2008):


Yes, you may have thought that Ashton United's season was starting next week but in a move that will shock many people, not least those associated with Droylsden who thought they were playing Tamworth this weekend, the Robins have had a very late promotion to the Blue Square North. It's a pity though that after all the work they've done on their ground this summer, they can't play it at Hurst Cross.

Or maybe I'm getting it all wrong and it just another proof reading error.

Then, when you turn over the next page there's this:


Why not? Do they want the answer in bullet points or in the form of an essay?

The fact that seasons tickets are still available suggests that if you come up with the best reason as to "why not", you might not like the prize.

And out of interest, has any non-league club ever sold out of season tickets or reached a point where none are ever available?

Padiham 1 - 2 Mossley

The penultimate match of Mossley's build-up for the new season ended in another victory for the Lilywhites, albeit a narrow one against the lowest ranked side they've faced so far - Vodkat First Division side Padiham.

Not for the first time in the games played this summer, Mossley had to come from behind to claim the win. one down at the interval, goals from Michael Fish (penalty) and Dave Hanlon in the opening ten minutes of the second half sealed the result.

Anyone worried about the slim margin of victory shouldn't be. There's little cause for concern as, not only was it a friendly, the last time Mossley faced a NWCFL second tier side (last seasons Manchester Premier Cup) they lost to their reserves. We have in fact actually improved.

Woo - and indeed - hoo!

Why We Watch Non-League Football - Part One

So we don't find ourselves associated with things like this:

Bayern Munich show what happens when you give the marketing team more money than they need...


Before watching it though I suggest you place a cushion, either on your lap or the floor, to protect your jaw when it drops around the 1:30 mark.

Liversedge 0 - 6 Mossley

Mossley's latest friendly saw the Lilywhites take a short trip along the M62 for their first pre-season game away from Seel Park. Liversegde's Clayborn Ground was the venue

Mossley continued their run of quietly impressive pre-season results with a comfortable victory at Northern Counties East side Liversedge. In reality it was a no-win game for the Lilywhites in that they were expected to emerge victorious but 6 - 0 is a pretty emphatic scoreline - even against a side from a lower division.

The six goals scored (Lee Blackshaw, Danny Egan, an o.g. and a second half hat-trick from Michael Fish) takes the total in the friendlies so far to 29 in 5 games; 19 in Mossley's favour and 9 not. Alas there'll be no footage of these most recent six as I wasn't at the game, and there won't be any footage of another game from this weekend either.

Normally at this time of the year when I can't get to a Mossley match I'll go and watch one of the other local friendlies taking place. However I decided instead to have one last football free Saturday afternoon before the season starts. This involved:

• Finally coming to the conclusion that the new look Mossley80 definitely won't be ready for the start of the 08/09 campaign.
  
  
• Getting my account at last.fm to work properly nearly 10 months after first joining
  
  
• Wondering why on earth I bothered registering an account with last.fm.
  
  
• Watching the third and final season of Arrested Development (the best sitcom in recent years, if not the last decade)
  
  
• Watching the pre-season game between Arsenal vs Juventus which was just as funny, if only for the commentators belief that Adebayor can shoot the home side to the Premiership title. Something I'll admit is entirely possible if league points start being awarded for shots off target and looking increasingly like a half season wonder.

Finally, there is a report on the Mossley friendly on the Liversedge website but I wouldn't put too much trust in which of our players they say did what. Though not impossible I doubt that it was our goalkeeper and not Michael Fish that scored the final three goals.

Mossley 2 - 2 Stockport County

The Lilywhites final home friendly of the 08/09 pre-season campaign didn't exactly get off to the best of starts.

Two goals in the first twenty minutes for the visitors planted the the thought that it was going to be a long night for Mossley but the expected flood of goals never arrived. Chances were at a premium for both sides but that's not to say it was a dull game because it wasn't. Despite the lack of goalmouth incidents it was good to watch two teams passing the ball around on the floor without resorting to the time honoured Seel Park "favourite" of knocking it as far up the pitch as humanly possible. In fact I don't think the ball flew over the ground perimeter once which is the first time that's happened in quite a while.

Midway through the second period the introduction of Messrs. Weston and Henry gave Mossley a bit more impetus in their quest to rescue a game that appeared beyond them, and it was from a surging run down the right by the former that the Lilyoranges grabbed what looked like a consolation goal; his low ball across the face of the goal tapped in by Danny Dignan with a little over eight minutes left on the clock.

With precisely no minutes left a significantly sized slice of good fortune drew Mossley level. Henry, Hanlon and Egan were all involved in the build-up to the goal but it was a County centre half who applied the final touch, deftly sending his own keeper the wrong way with a tiny flick of hit outstretched boot.

While never coming close to matching the previous three friendlies in terms of the number of incidents contained in their respective ninety minutes, it was nevertheless entertaining. Even if the game had finished 2- 0 to County I think that many of the Mossley fans present would still have left the ground happy with what they saw.

If you want a different, and a better written, take on this match then try the official Stockport County version

But you haven't come to Mossley80 to read have you? No, you've come to see if I've stuck any footage of the match up on YouTube. Well, just so you don't leave disappointed:



I apologise for the delay if you have been eager to read about the match or see the highlights (you never know, there might be 'that' someone) but I went to see the new X-Files movie instead.

Some things are more important than football! ;-)

Portugal 4 - 1 France

With Mossley away re-enacting the opening scenes of Chariots of Fire on the Merseyside coastline, the blank weekend in the pre-season schedule gave me a chance to see one of the group games in the European Learning Disabilities Football Championship that has been taking place in Manchester over the past week.

Both sides line up for the national anthems. Portugal on the right behind their red and green flag, France on the left behind the... flag of the Netherlands. Oops!

Despite the fixture being the proverbial dead rubber(having both lost to England and Hungary, neither side could make it to make the semi-finals) there was national pride at stake and that was more than enough to make it a potentially entertaining encounter. And entertaining it was.

I'll admit that I went into the Tameside Stadium not expecting a particularly high standard of football (France, for example, had lost 10 - 0 to England in their opening game of the competition 10-0) but what I saw was better than many of the matches I've been over the past few seasons.

I've no idea at what level many of the players perform at away from the Championships (I know a few England players ply their trade in non-league) but the skill level on both sides was very high. The standouts though were the Portugese midfield pairing of Nelson Paulo and Luis Teixeira who were, frankly, fantastic to watch and wouldn't look out of place in many a side.


The obligatory pre-international match team shots. Does the number six n the bottom picture remind you of a slightly chubbier version of another Portugese national?

Sadly the attendance was incredibly disappointing which is what happens when a) England are playing at the same time three miles away and b) there's been little in the way of advertising. In relation to the latter it's unforunatley a sign of the times when the only way you can get a mention in the local media is if it paints the local council/councillors in a good light or it's related to either of the two b's: boxing and Bower Fold.

It's not just the media though. One of the competitions biggest backers, the FA, can't find room to publicise it on the front two pages of its web site. The competitions governing body INAS-FID hasn't updated its site since February, and their parent organisation MENCAP can only find room for the smallest of mentions on their home page.

All of which adds up to something of a shame as the teams efforts deserve to be seen by more people.

I could wax lyrical about the game for a while but as action speaks louder than words you're far better off just watching some of the highlights. 'Some' being the operative word as what follows was originally three times longer due to the number of chances and other notable incidents that occurred; so many in fact that the battery on my camera ran out seconds after the final whistle, something which didn't even happen during the three hour play-off marathon between Stalybridge and Southport back in May.

Things to watch out for include France being led out by the flag of the Netherlands, more examples of why "I Feel Good" being played over the P.A. system is sometimes inappropriate after a goal and Portugal's second from Luis Teixeira which is a doozy:

Mossley 5 - 3 Hyde United

The final part of most trilogies these days tends to be the weakest of the three.

Take the movies for instance. Spiderman 3 is a bloated facsimile of the previous two entries in the franchise. After the darkness of the Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi climaxes with a Galactic Empire being overthrown by teddy bears. Happily this game. Mossley's third in a week against local Blue Square North opposition, bucked the trend. Not that it didn't come very close to being a Mission:Impossible III.

Following two good, incident packed games against Stalybridge and Droylsden, this match with Hyde looked to have run out of steam midway through the second half; the visitors lead neither looked like being pegged back or added to. With so little in the way of goalmouth action from either side there was more than one supporter looking at their watch, willing the minute hand to move round a little faster.

This meant that what happened in the final quarter of the game came as something of a shock: a 2 - 1 pre-season run out suddenly became an eight goal thriller with five goals in the final fifteen minutes, and four of them coming from the boot of Danny Egan.

The game kicked into life with Leon Henry heading narrowly wide before a cock-up between Dootson and one of his centre halves gave substitute Egan the easiest of tap-ins to pull Mossley level. Minutes later the same player put Mossley ahead with a sweetly struck volley back across the face of the goal from a flicked-on Lee Blackshaw cross, before he completed his hat-trick by applying the finish to another Blackshaw cross.

All Hyde had to show in response to Mossley as they moved up through the gears and threatened to run riot was a close range shot that substitute keeper Mottershead did very well to save, but with three minutes left they pulled the deficit back to one with a well struck shot from the edge of the box.

Any thoughts of the Tigers snatching an equaliser were quickly banished though when Egan, saving his best till last, struck a looping volley over Dootson's replacement for Mossley's fifth and his fourth of the game.

But what happened in the first half I hear you cry? Oh, you're not? Well I'll tell you anyway.

The opening forty-five, while not reaching the heights the game was to touch in the second period, was watchable and not without its share of incidents. And just as in the previous friendlies, Mossley's opening goal arrived with little warning. Like Hyde, the Lilwhites had posed no real threat to their opponents goal when, out of nothing, Phil Charnock cracked an inch perfect low shot from 30 yards through a group of players and past the dive of Craig Dootson.

A goal in front, Mossley started to press forward a bit more to try and push home their advantage but twice before the break they were caught flat at the back, allowing Hyde to go into the interval ahead through a couple of very well taken goals, particularly Matthew Tipton's chipped effort a minute before they all trooped off for the orange slices. What happened next you've already read about.

All the good points from Mossley's games over the past week were in evidence again in this one: the desire to keep the ball on the deck, the willingness to shoot when the opportunity presents itself rather than trying to walk the ball in the net, the continual closing down of the opposition when not in possession and the fact that the players seemed to be enjoying themselves.

It's still pre-season though but even if we take just a tiny bit of what we've shown so far into the games that matter, it's almost a certainty that we won't be spending January through to April anxiously eyeing the results around the foot of the table.

To be honest I've no idea why I bothered writing any of the above as you can it all for yourself in the following clips. All eight goals, near misses, good saves and a couple of challenges that were way O.T.T. for a friendly, uploaded to YouTube for your viewing pleasure:

Mossley 3 - 4 Droylsden

It may be July but we've already had the first shock of the new season. Following over 24 hours of almost non-stop, and at times torrential, rain a Mossley home game actually went ahead!

Normally when we've had the kind of weather that gets amateur Noah's excited, the Seel Park surface is more suited to the growing of rice than playing football, but not only was the pitch playable it looked like it hadn't been touched by a drop of water - no puddles and solid under foot. Could it be that the age of miracles is finally upon us? Or, a trifle more likely I'll admit, has the drainage finally started to work properly?

Despite the numerous heavy showers prior to kick-off the game began under blue skies but it was a start that was anything other than bright for Mossley. Already a goal down after three minutes, Droylsden were knocking the ball around with an abandon that in days gone by would be classed as gay and things were looking ominous for Mossley.

Just as in the Stalybridge match four days earlier though, the Lilywhites scored a goal without ever having looked remotely threatening and then proceeded to run rings around their more senior opponents.

Michael Fish started the Lilywhites scoring spree in the seventh minute when he hooked a cross from a quickly taken free-kick into the net from close range, and this was quickly followed up two minutes later when Danny Dignan capitalised on some shoddy defending to put Mossley ahead.

The home side now looked dangerous everytime they went forward and when a looping shot cannoned of the crossbar, one Droylsden fan behind the goal (20 minutes into his sides first friendly) let loose a prolonged verbal volley at his side, comparing them numerous times to various quantities of excrement, e.g. piles of s**t, loads of s**t, etc.

Thankfully he was cut off in mid-flow when Mossley scored their third of the game. Obviously buoyed by the support being given by the man stood behind them, Droylsden once again cheaply surrendered possession. Dignan was again the beneficiary of the visitors mistake and after taking the ball past Danny Meadowcroft he calmly who calmly slotted it past Kennedy for his second of the game.

The interval saw both sides make a host of changes to their line-ups and in truthfulness the second period was nowhere near as good as the first. There was plenty of effort but little in the way of goalmouth action and the longer the match wore the more it seemed like both sides had settled on 3 - 1 being the final score.

As we all know though in football things can change in a minute, and within the space of two of them Droylsden had drawn level; like Mossley in the first half, the Bloods benefiting greatly from some sloppy passing by their opponents. With five minutes left another defensive slip-up presented Droylsden with the opportunity to win the game and despite the best efforts of a defender on the line, it was one Maguire took.

It would have been nice to have won, especially after being 3 - 1 up for the majority of the match, but you can't have everything. While some elementary mistakes ultimately gave Droylsden the win (which is to be expected from a group of players who've barely met let alone played along side one another) it has to be said that until they occurred Mossley never looked in any kind of trouble. I know it's a cliché but at times you couldn't tell which side was the one that plies their trade at a higher level of football.

Of course Mossley were the recipients themselves of some ridiculous generosity from the opposition but who amongst us cares if Droylsden can't defend properly?

Anyway, here's the bit you've skipped the above carefully constructed paragraphs to see - clips of the game:


So there you have it, a game that will be remembered for a few well taken goals, sloppy passing, nice weather, a Droylsden fan with a lack of perspective and some 'Last of the Summer Wine' style antics from a few of the home supporter's in trying to retrieve a wind displaced hat.

What? You didn't see the latter? Oh you missed a treat...

Mossley 3 - 1 Stalybridge Celtic

No, your eyes do not deceive you. After over a month of inactivity Mossley80 is back to report on the start of the 'phoney war' or the the pre-season friendlies as they're otherwise known.

First of all I'd like to apologise for the lack of updates over the close season. I had written a couple of pieces but announcements elsewhere (for example the statement about the shares) made them redundant before I'd had chance to post them.

I had also intended to redesign the blog slightly to freshen it up. However the passage of time has seen that little project grow from simply changing a few of the graphics to a complete rebuild from the source code up. This has meant getting to grips with two programming languages I'd previously avoided like the plague (along with other techy stuff too boring to divulge) and it has been a slow and incredibly time consuming process. As such it means that something I hoped would be ready for the start of the season won't be; in fact having it ready by Christmas is looking incredibly optimistic at the moment. The basic structure of the new site is up, running and navigable but until I'm completely happy that everything is working properly and the glitches are debugged, it shall remain under wraps.

Anyhoo, all that's for another time. What you've come to this page wanting to know about is Mossley's first friendly of the season against Stalybridge Celtic in the Frank Robinson memorial trophy. The eagle eyed amongst you will have already noticed the score at the top of the page so as half of my work is done, I'll just fill in the blanks.

This could be very well be Nick Challinor on the ball for Mossley but I'm not 100% sure. Too many new names and faces to learn in the space of 90 minutes..

For the first twenty minutes of the game Mossley looked exactly like what they were - a team of strangers. Passes were wayward, tackles were missed, positioning was just an eleven letter word, etc. and somewhat unsurprisingly a virtually full strength Celtic side dominated the proceedings. That they didn't capitalise on this advantage was down to three things: last ditch defensive blocks, a couple of outstanding saves from Liam Higginbotham and some finishing from Celtic's forward line that the word 'laughable' could have been invented for.

Around the midway point of the half though Mossley finally began to click. Passes started to find their intended recipients, important tackles were being won and the Celtic defence was suddenly having to treat the game as more than the gentle run out it had previously seemed.

The Lilywhites improvement was quickly rewarded when the Stalybridge keeper spilled the ball under pressure, giving former Celtic reserve Michael Fish the relatively easy task of rolling the ball into an almost open net from close range. Less than ten minutes later a much more impressive strike from the edge of the box curled its way around the Bridge custodian and into the net, doubling both Mossley's and Fish's tally for the game.

The interval saw both sides take the opportunity to make sweeping changes to their respective line-ups and the following forty five minutes of football was a much more evenly balanced affair. Mossley went close to adding to their total when one of the many Dave's we currently have in the squad hit the crossbar with a looping effort, before Lee Ellington halved the deficit for Celtic just after the hour mark with a nicely executed volley from around 12 yards out.

If there had been something important riding on it, the rest of the game could probably have been described as nail-biting. Like the first half the visitors once again began to spurn a series of golden opportunities although the Lilywhites do have Matthew Kemp, and hit two goal line clearances in the space of a minute, to thank in part for keeping their lead intact.

Not that Celtic weren't living dangerously either. Time and again the Mossley forwards broke through their high defensive line (I say line, I've seen u-bends straighter than Stalybridge's offside trap) and five minutes from time, with Mossley down to 10 men through injury, local lad David Brook sealed the victory with a cool finish when one-on-one with the keeper.

You can just see how good a finish it was in the following video, which contains clips of the other three goals scored along with a few other chances I managed to capture. It's all a bit shaky but it is pre-season for me as well! ;):


With the first match of the summer now come and gone, try as you might, you can't help but be ever so slightly impressed by Mossley's performance against a much more experienced and established side. However they are merely friendlies and just as you can't get overly depressed and critical after a defeat, you shouldn't go overboard with optimism and praise either following a fine result; a good pre-season doesn't necessarily mean a good season and vice-versa. I mean, we're not going to come up against players like Chris Hall every week - a large proportion of teams we'll face are going to have forwards who can shoot straight.

When all's said and done though, our trialists beat their trialists. ;)

So today the Frank Robinson Memorial Trophy, tomorrow the world! Saturday Droylsden at home.

All That's Missing Is The Vicar Popping Round

Anyway, on a note completely unrelated to the above image (I don't know why I used it really), the rumours that have been doing the rounds lately in local non-league football have turned out to be true; Gerry Quinn has been replaced at Seel Park by ex-Woodley Sports manager, Chris Willcock.

I wish that I could say it came as a surprise but the silence when it came to refuting those rumours was noticeably deafening.

I've no reason not to believe the chain if events in the official statement released by Mossley but if it was knowledge to some people outside the club on Sunday that a change had been made (and with the correct names involved), why the delay before announcing that the appointment had been made on Wednesday night?

So for the second successive year we head into the new season with a new man in charge. What's different this time round though, at least for me, is that the optimism I had at this time in 2007 is no longer there. Having seen Woodley under the guidance of our new manager more times than was good for my health over the course of last season, it's going to take some convincing for me to believe that the next campaign will see an improvement in the clubs fortunes on the pitch.

I sincerely hope that my fears prove unfounded and that we have a memorable 2008/09 season before going from strength to strength and onto better things. In the meantime though I hope you don't mind if I say that my enthusiasm for it has waned slightly.

At this point I'd like to thank Gerry Quinn for his stint with us and that goes for the players too as I'm sure that many, if not all, will depart to pastures new after the latest turn of events in the saga that is Mossley AFC. I'm not going to rewrite history and say last season would have been a good one if it wasn't for the money problems (we put in too many sub-par performances for the to be the case), but nobody who stuck by the club through troubled times deserves to leave the club in a manner better than one that has the hint of being scripted by Brian Rix.

What now? Well I don't know about you but I'm off to the Stalybridge forum to see if anyone's heard any rumours about what's happening in regards to the shares many supporters bought in Mossley last summer, because we sure as hell don't know and that's where our news appears to be coming from.

Still, it wouldn't be a Mossley summer though would it if we didn't challenge Manchester City in the "I can't believe it" forehead slapping stakes?

Stats Entertainment 2007/08

Later than planned (much later) here is the second annual Mossley80 statistics bonanza.

Its not quite as comprehensive as it could have been but this is offset by the fact that you are getting this for free. Therefore any complaints are automatically deemed null and void. ;-)

If you want to make comparisons to some of last years figures, they're available here, so without further ado:

A few other things of note:

• Like last season, over a fifth of the goals Mossley conceded came in the last ten minutes of matches.
  
• Mossley lost every game at Seel Park in which they kicked towards the Park End in the first half.
  
• The longest period of time they went without conceding a goal was 202 minutes between 03/11/07 and 17/11/07.
  
• Conversely, the longest period of time they went without scoring was 335 minutes between 13/10/07 and 03/11/07.

Any other information that can be gleaned from the above statistics I'll leave up to you to provide.

And that's that for Mossley80's penultimate piece about the 2007/08 season. Or if you're only interested in posts that have an element of seriousness about them and/or some relation to football - the final 2007/08 posting on this blog.

Best Laid Plans, Etc...

I had originally intended that the next update to this blog would be a few statistics pertaining to the season just gone.

However, when you spend most of your day working with spreadsheets, the last thing you want to do when you get home is bury your head in even more numbers whilst negotiating the exciting world of multi-sheet functions. As a consequence the work that needs to be done keeps getting put off in favour of more exciting things such as the new Indiana Jones film or jet washing the wheelie bin.

The reason as to why this isn't that list of numbers detailing goal times, etc. is because I promised something to a couple of people at last night's Mossley AFC quiz night after a few of the early questions had a Sylvester Stallone theme.

That something in question is a clip from the Turkish remake of Rambo.

Yes, you did just read 'clips from the Turkish remake of Rambo'.

It's a no-expense spent production that really has to be seen to be believed. It's hard to pick out a particular highlight but things to look out for include the RPG launcher that does a spectacularly hopeless job of launching RPG's, as well as some of the worst on-screen deaths ever committed to celluloid in the name of entertainment:


And as an added bonus, somebody has gone to the trouble of condensing all six Rocky films into a much more palatable five seconds (-ish) running time:


Oh, and by the way, the new Indiana Jones film isn't that bad - in fact it's better than you probably would have expected. The 'mcguffin' isn't a particularly strong one and the ending is a bit of a let-down, but the balance between humour, sentiment and action (the equation which has let down many of the wannabe films such as The Mummy and National Treasure) is perfectly weighted.

It goes without saying that there are leaps in logic that you shouldn't spend too much time thinking about, but an early scene that includes the caretaker from Scrubs and Jim Robinson from Neighbours does briefly make you think you're watching an Indiana Jones film from an alternative dimension.

Anyhoo, fingers crossed, the next posting should be those statistics. Or it could be about the Eurovision Song Contest...

Coming Full Circle

After starting the 07/08 season watching Stalybridge Celtic versus Manchester City reserves way back in July, it seemed a fitting piece of symmetry, after 40+ Lilywhite matches, to end it by watching the Bower Fold club.

The late decision to travel to Celtic's Conference North Play-off Final against Barrow was rewarded by the lack of traffic on the motorways; a rare instance that resulted in a leisurely 90 minute drive to Burton's Pirelli Stadium.

As new grounds go Burton Albion's might not be the biggest or the best in the country but, pitch apart, it's a great place to watch football. Even though it is almost twice as expensive at £7m, it shows up the Tameside Stadium to be the missed opportunity that it is.

The ease in finding a parking space half an hour before kick-off suggested that the game wasn't to be the sell out some had hoped for and so it proved to be. Of course the decision for a 7:30pm kick-off on a Friday night in South Derbyshire didn't go anyway towards helping to boost the gate but there certainly looked a tad more than the official total of 2,500. While not being anywhere near as well supported as Barrow, the lack of numbers from Stalybridge was also quite surprising.

As for the game itself it wasn't a classic. Aided and abetted by some terribly wayward defending and some notable no shows in terms of performance from their opponents, Barrow did the bare minimum necessary to win the game but they did it well. It was only in the last 20 minutes of the match when a goal down that Stalybridge decided to make a proper fist of the game - hitting the post and having a nailed on penalty turned down by the referee but it was too little too late.

In fact this probably made things worse for the Stalybridge fans in attendance as it showed them what might have been had the team expanded their twenty minute cameo to cover the course of the ninety.

The weirdest thing is though that despite being stood in Stalybridge end, knee deep in black and orange balloons, I remained entirely nonplussed with the events unfolding around me. Usually my neutrality at games not involving Mossley eventually gives way to me preferring one side over the other but for the second time in a week this wasn't the case.

I've been trying to think of the reason as to why I remained completely ambivalent to the events unfolding around but any conclusion so far remains elusive. On the one hand, if Mossley can't have any success then I don't want a club in a neighbouring town to have any either. It's selfish I know but it's football - why labour under the pretence that local rivalry is a charade and we all want each other to go on to bigger and better things?

On the other though I didn't really want Barrow to win either, purely as payback for foisting Neil Briscoe and other reserve team no-hopers on us last season. Well that and self-preservation: the last thing you should do when surrounded by a few hundred football supporters from one club is cheer on the side they're playing.

Anyhow, like I said, the best team on the night won and the solitary goal they scored to do that is included in the video footage below. So commiserate with Stalybridge or take great delight in their defeat - the choice is yours:


Despite having just won promotion to the Conference, more than a few Barrow fans decided a more pressing concern than celebrating with their team was to get as close to the opposing fans as possible and goad them (and with a fair number of Celtic fans attempting to get on the pitch to "discuss" it with them), it seemed a good a time as any to say farewell to live football for the season and start the countdown for the arrival of the first friendly.

Two and bit months if you're interested...

When, Er... Sunday Comes

The continuing need to see live non-league football, even though the Unibond season has finished, meant that there were more than a few Mossley supporters amongst the 1700+ present at Bower Fold on Sunday to watch Stalybridge take on Southport in the second leg of their Conference North Play-Off Semi Final.


I'm not going to go into great detail about the game, primarily because there was almost three hours of it, so if you want in-depth knowledge on what happened I suggest visiting one of the many other places on the internet where there will be. In any case the bits that really matter are featured in the following video:


So, anyone for Burton on Friday?

Elsewhere...

The season may be done and dusted for Mossley but non-league football continues unabated in various pockets of Tameside and the surrounding area.

So many games in fact, that it was possible to watch a match everyday between the Monday after the Wakefield game and the following Sunday. At least that was the case if you completely ignore the fact there was none on Thursday and Friday.

All of which meant good news for those Mossley supporters desperate to extend their fix of non-professional football for at least another week.

The week began at Glossop North End’s rearranged game with Trafford and what game it was. With nothing to play for and a pitch resembling something you’d expect to see Sébastien Loeb struggling to steer his rally car through rather than anything you'd play football on.


Given both the conditions and that there was nothing for either team to play for (Trafford having already been crowned champions of the NWCL), you'd have forgiven either side if they approached the game at anything less than a 100%. It's to their great credit though that they didn't and in a surface mocking ninety minutes, they produced one of the best matches I've seen this season: no long ball, no quarter given attacking football.

Trafford eventually won the game 2 – 1, a result which was incredibly unfair on Glossop as the least they deserved was a draw. I just wish that the following footage did better service to showing just how good a game it was.

Sadly I have no footage of Glossop’s goal but to paint a picture with words, it was a well struck shot from the edge of the area that wouldn’t have gone in had it not been for the Trafford keeper’s decision to lather his gloves with butter prior to kick-off. Evidence of which can be found in two of the earlier clips in this highlights, YouTube, video package... er, thing:


Passing up the opportunity on Tuesday to journey to Skelmersdale and see Curzon's season finally implode ("Hey Mickey you're so fine, you're so fine you got sent off after 20 minutes for head butting an opponent, thereby ruining the chances of your team being rewarded for their seasons endeavours with promotion to the Unibond Premier League, Hey Mickey clap-clap clap Hey Mickey clap-clap clap"), the next game to be taken in by the Mossley nomads was the NWCL League Cup Final at the Tameside Stadium on Wednesday.

Five years ago in the same competition we watched Mossley lift the cup after beating Clitheroe in a game that could best be described by simply saying that it happened, such was the paucity of entertainment contained therein.

Thankfully though the 2008 version involving Bootle and Maine Road was slightly more entertaining. Although it very nearly didn't happen, at least not on that night.

When I got to the ground 55 minutes before kick-off the place was shut. Only the faint sound of Silver Lady by David Soul being played over the tannoy giving any indication that there was somebody in.

It was only when the Bootle team arrived and a figure finally emerged from the bowels of the stadium that I, along with the smattering of people who'd turned up after me, eventually found out what was happening: the referee had only just given the game the go ahead. An early evening downpour had put the game in some doubt and when we were finally allowed into the ground it was easy to see why - the pitch was horrendous.

A lot of the markings were forming whitewash puddles along the touchline, whilst at least a good third of the pitch was under differing levels of water. Where sand had been ten days earlier in Curzon's game with Clitheroe, there was now a paddling pool. Goodness knows what it would have had to have been like for the match to be postponed

By kick-off though the drainage had performed something of a miracle and the pitch was in a near playable half grass/ half ankle deep mud state.

Maine Road took an early lead and one which, to be honest, never looked like being pegged back as Bootle offered nothing in the way of a threat. That was until the stroke of half-time when the Liverpool side surprised everyone, not least their own supporters, by scoring from a corner.


The second half began with Maine Road regaining the advantage before a double substitution by Bootle turned the game on its head and they got a deserved equaliser with fifteen minutes left. Despite the best efforts of both sides, the game went into extra-time and eventually penalties before Maine Road were determined as the winners; condemning Bootle to their second cup final defeat in the space of a week after losing to Kirkham & Wesham in the Division Two Cup.

Unfortunately, as is becoming something of a worrying habit, I missed one of the goals (in this case Maine Road's opener), but at least I got the other three scored in normal time during the NWCL League Cup Final. Bootle are in yellow by the way:


While there were only 201 people present (a fair few of them being neutrals too including a Ramsbottom fan who recognised us from our visits to Riverside Ground years ago and ex-Lilywhite Joe Shaw) the game was played in a friendly atmosphere, free from any animosity. Although it would have been nice if the the father of one of the Bootle officials had stopped moaning at a very good referee for the odd minute or two.

So that's been two good games in the space of a week and now it's up to Stalybridge in the second leg of their Play-Off semi-final on Sunday to make it a hat-trick.

If Watching It Once Wasn't Bad Enough...

Due to a number of technical reasons too boring to go into detail about, I wasn't able to put any of the video footage I took at the Wakefield game up on the blog at the week end. However, now that those problems have been solved, I can finally upload them.

I know that it's something people have hardly been on the edge of their seats waiting for but what little action there was I've compiled into a highlights (or rather moments 'moments that almost woke the crowd up') reel.

So if you want to relive Mossley's final game of the 07/08 season you can courtesy of You Tube, where it is now kept for the ages. If you don't, well... I don't think anyone could blame you!

Then again, once you take out 86 minutes it looks like it was a half decent match:

Mossley 0 - 0 Wakefield

I was hoping to start this, the final match report of the season, with some inspiring words that would resonate amongst those who are proud to associate themselves with Mossley AFC.

Unfortunately all I can come up with is: "Good grief! Wasn't that a dull game?"

Whilst it's a sentiment that will probably get everyone nodding in agreement, it wasn't one I was aiming for.

With neither side on show having anything left to play for the final game of the season turned out to be a ninety minute long sedative; the kind of game where you'd happily stick pins in a voodoo doll of yourself just to stay awake.


I could go into detail about what happened (meaning exilharating passages of text such as 'the spherical playing apparatus rolled gently across the low-growing, green herbage covering the ground, before finally crossing the whitewashed line running parallel to St Jospeh's primary school' and 'the assistant referee signalled goal kick and everyone nodded in agreement for it was a goal kick') but the chances are that either you or I could have slipped into a boredom induced coma long before the third paragraph.

Of course, being responsible for the clubs official match report, along with the one that's printed in the Reporter, I've had to do a straight report on the game and here it is:

With promotion and relegation no longer on the thoughts of both Mossley and Wakefield, there was a concern amongst the supporters present that this would be a game that contained little of note.

And sadly those instincts proved to be correct as the final match of the season looked, for the most part, like the first pre-season friendly of the 08/09 campaign.

What little action the opening period saw was dominated by the home side but their season old problem of converting that superiority into shots and, ultimately, goals once again came to the fore. This meant that despite the ball spending a considerable amount of time in his box, Wakefield keeper Andy Woods had little to do other than pluck the odd cross out of the air or restart the game with a goal kick.

An incident that would have been mentioned in the report had it not been ruled offside

Only twice was he called upon to actually making a save and they both came from shots outside the area. The first was a straight forward catch from a long range effort by Martin Allison but the second, a 35 yard snapshot by Michael Fish, forced him into making a sprawling save to turn the ball away for a corner.

If Mossley shaded the first half, the visitors edged the second, even if it was only by the length of a gnats eyelash. Wakefield were more than content to defend deep and hit Mossley on the break and as the home side laboured in attack, it was a tactic almost paid dividends for them.

Fortunately for Mossley they had goalkeeper Ashley Connor to thank for the final time this season in keeping the scores level, pulling off three good saves to stop the Yorkshire side from notching their third successive victory over the Lilywhites within the space of two months.


As the game slowly lurched towards its conclusion (so slowly in fact that you could have sworn time was going backwards) Mossley almost snatched a dramatic winner in added on time at the end of the match. Some good work by Gareth Hamlet set in motion a chain of events that forced Woods into making three saves in almost as many seconds at his near post to deny Hamlet and Allison twice.

More goals have been scored in games involving Mossley than any other club in the Unibond North this season. Therefore it was somewhat ironic that after 41 games which had seen a total of 160 scored, the 42nd and final match should end without one.

And while Mossley would have undoubtedly liked to have finished what has been a turbulent season with a bang, the result did at least ensure that they go into the next one unbeaten in three league games, as well as giving them their first clean sheet since the end of November.

I don't want to blow my own trumpet but I think I deserve some kind of medal for managing to get 466 words out of a game that could best be described by putting Z-Z-Z-Z in a 96 point bold font.

Subbuteo: The Non-League Edition. Michael Fish seems unperturbed by the giant hand hovering inches away from his head.

That said we didn't play too badly at all. In fact it was the kind of performance you wished we'd put in two or three months ago to stop the rot a bit sooner. Better late than never though and it did at least mean that we finished the year on an upbeat note which is something to be thankful for after all that has gone on in the previous eight months.

So roll on next season then and whatever delights await.

Wakefield Up Before We Go-Go

Here it is - the final game of the season.

Eight and a half months of blood, sweat and tears (and that was just the matches against Garforth) comes down to this: aiming to finish fifth from bottom whilst attempting to stop Wakefield from becoming the second team to do the treble over us in the league (the other in question being Curzon).

It would be nice to put one over our 8th placed opponents and it would be even nicer if it was through a winner scored deep into stoppage time at the end of the game, just to restore the balance of football karma after their winner in similar circumstances back in March.

Will we win? Will we go into next season on the back of three straight wins? Will there be 'a next season'? Will we keep our first clean sheet since November? Will more than 130 people turn up? Will Robinson – danger? Will it rain?

Answers to all those questions when we come back.

Prediction: It's always best to end on a high so a win for Mossley.

Mossley 2 - 1 Garforth Town

Ideally I would have liked this posting to have been longer but as I've forgotten how to do match reports on games that we've won, I'm afraid that the following is going to have to suffice.


As the sun starts to set on the 07/08 season, it turns out that victories are a lot like buses for Mossley in that you wait an age for one and suddenly two turn up at once.

After finally putting any remaining relegation worries behind them with their first win in six games at Bridlington last Saturday, the Lilywhites followed it up with a hard fought but ultimately merited victory over Garforth Town.

The first real shot in anger came in the 23rd minute from Mossley's David Boardman and not only did it force the Town keeper into making a good save but it kicked a moribund, atypical end of season affair into life as well. And Boardman was to have a hand (or rather foot) in all of home sides better opportunities that followed before he finally put the Lilywhites deservedly ahead five minutes from the interval.

Picking up the ball just outside the Garforth penalty from Michael Fish's pass, Boardman's first touch took him away from his marker before powering a low shot past Town keeper Phillips with his second.

He shoots...

... he scores! David Boardman puts Mossley ahead.

Or if still images aren't good enough for you, you can watch the goal in real time here:


The early stages of the second half saw the visitors finally take a more proactive approach towards getting something from the game by putting their hosts under their first sustained spell of pressure. Apart from two Mark Piper shots both expertly dealt with by Ashley Connor though, the Lilywhites' lead rarely looked in any danger. So much so that when Leon Henry scored his first goal for Mossley in the 71st minute by floating the ball over the despairing dive of Phillips from 20+ yard, the taking of the three points on offer looked like a formality.

Leon Henry makes it 2 - 0 with a very well taken goal:


Mossley being Mossley though, it wasn't to be that straight forward. Twelve minutes away from keeping their first clean sheet in nearly five months, Piper exploited a rare lack of concentration on the night from the home defence to lose his marker at a corner and head the dead ball kick past Connor. As well as being a relatively soft goal to concede and giving the visitors an unexpected lifeline, it also had the unwanted distinction of being the hundredth conceded by Mossley in the league during the 07/08 campaign.

The 100th goal of the league campaign to enter Mossley's net, er... enters Mossley's net:


Somewhat inevitably this lead to a few nervy moments for the home side in the closing stages of the game, particularly in the five minutes of extra time that were added on when the Yorkshire side fired off more shots than they had done in the previous ninety minutes. Thankfully though none of them went close to unduly worrying Ashley Connor and the Lilywhites lead remained intact when the final whistle eventually sounded.


It might not have been the greatest game in the world but it was an enjoyable one nonetheless and, along with the previous result, goes someway towards helping Mossley's troubled season end on a high, albeit a low high.

It was also nice to finally get one over Garforth too. Its the third time I've seen them this season and I can only assume that their self declared comparison with Brazilian football is some kind of ironic joke being played on non-league football. The only thing South American about them is that it's where some of their forward passes and regular clearances may come close to landing in the near future.

After more poor games than I care to remember it was a refreshing and welcome change to see Mossley recapture some of their early season form in this game. It may be too little too late to stop this campaign from being something other than a disappointment but I'll take what little there is as a seed with the potential to grow into bigger and better things.

And on that healthy and rare note of optimism on Mossley80, I'll end the report and let you get on with something else much more interesting such as watching this.

Again And Again And Again...

As I did a preview for the initial staging of this rearranged fixture ten days ago, I’m not feeling the slightest bit compelled to write a new one. Call it laziness if you want, I call it running out things to say about Garforth at the fourth time of asking.

What I will say is that since writing this Mossley have finally won their second game of 2008 while Simon Clifford’s side haven't won for four matches.

Mossley also have to survive 180 minutes of football without conceding a goal if they’re not to see the figure of 100 appear in their ‘goals against’ column; no mean feat considering that it has been 23 games since we’ve kept a clean sheet.

The picture on the left is the only visual representation I can think of for 99 other than some red balloons. Just be thankful we weren’t stuck on 69...

Prediction: No change from what I wrote a week last Friday – a win for Mossley.

Bridlington Town 2 - 3 Mossley

See, I told you!

Not only did Mossley register their long time coming second win of 2008, but they also claimed their first win on Yorkshire soil this season and, in doing so, ensured that the club would still have its Unibond status for the start of the new campaign. At least that is if the club is still in exisistence come August.

As well as avoiding the possibility of finishing rock bottom of the First Division North, the 3-2 victory over Bridlington Town at the windswept Queensgate Stadium (at least I'm guessing it was a tad breezy) also means that we can't finish second bottom either. Who said that this was a disappointing season?

In the end it was two goals from Martin Allison and a 61st minute winner from Paul Garvey that ensured that Mossley will start the 08/09 season with at least two wins under their belts since the year was rung in.

Whilst having bored everyone in the build-up to this match with tales of how this was a nailed on three points, the final scoreline was something of a surprise; mainly because when I rang up Bridlington at half-time to find out the score, the combination of a crackly line and the Tameside Stadium's overly loud P.A.system had lead me to believe that we were 3 - 0 down!

Yes, instead of braving the elements sweeping in off the North Sea, I was shivering myself silly at Curzon's bitterly cold home on Ashton. Which was surprising really as places with as much sand as Curzon had on their pitch tend to be a lot, lot warmer.

The Sahara encroaches onto the Tameside Stadium playing surface

I could go into great detail about the clash (rather too literally at times) between the Blues and, the not Blues for the day, Clitheroe but as I don't really want to I'll keep it short and say that this was a great game of football. Goals, countless talking points and more ex-Mossley players than you could shake a stick at - it certainly made a refreshing change to be at an exciting match on a Saturday afternoon. As someone pointed out as the game neared its climax, it's hard to believe that Mossley are actually in the same division as the sides that fought out an entertaining 2 - 2 draw.

Gary Lowe's scarf is not available to buy in the club shop.

It was also interesting to see, or rather hear, that the playing of "I feel good" after Curzon score isn't as bad as things get. If it's Norton that scores the goal, the crowd also get a brief burst of the opening verse of Toni Basil's seminal 1980's hit 'Hey Micky', an act which registers a high 8.7 on the Camp-ometer. What next? A brief snatch of "Favourite Things" from The Sound of Music when Josh Mitten scores?

So instead of reading about the game you can, in a first for this blog, watch selected highlights of it. See four well taken goals, witness some tough tackles, observe a slightly embarrassing miss and, most of all, be amazed at Curzon's incredible tumbling Spaniard*:


* As always - be careful as it contains some particularly off colour language.

Beside The Sea

Well here it is, our last away day of the season. And it's one that sees Mossley making the longish trip to the North Yorkshire coast to face Bridlington Town for the latest installment in the saga of who's going finishes the closest to Woodley Sports come the end of the month.

A scene from our last visit to the Queensgate Stadium. Clicking the picture will take you to a bigger, yet much grainier, version of it.

Like Ossett in our previous match, we enter the third game of the season against our opponents with both sides having picked up a victory apiece in the previous two games. The Lilywhites won the first encounter 2 – 1 at the tail end of 2007 (little knowing that it was to be our last win for two and a half months) while the second meeting last month wasn’t quite as close - Bridlington inflicting a slightly embarrassing 5 – 2 home defeat on us.

If you scroll down this page (or click the relevant link in the side bar – it should be obvious which one) you’ll find an overview of Bridlington’s recent match with Woodley Sports. If you can’t be bothered (which I assume will be everybody reading this) what it basically says is that Brid are a nice passing side with a fair amount of creative players spread amongst their line-up.

Happily for Mossley however, their major failing appears to be in front of goal where they appear to possess all the incisiveness and eye for goal of... well, us really. Granted, it’s an opinion formed on the basis of just this one match but as such trifling matters like that don’t stop professional pundits, so it’ll not stop me either.

Prediction: As I'm not going, a nailed on win for Mossley. Something which I hope will be confirmed in the numerous calls to Bridlington I'll be making from the Tameside sand trap this Saturday, where I'll be watching Clitheroe put a further dent in Curzon's title aspirations.

Ossett Albion 2 - 1 Mossley

The problem with writing official match reports is that they're often quite mundane and characterless. This is because they come under close scrutiny from the league who have a zero tolerance approach to the criticism of players and officials. It's a stance which is entirely understandable given the number of people who are quick to blame everyone else other than their own teams failings.

Sometimes though they have to be criticised so in order to get around this unspoken rule euphemisms have to be used. For instance 'hot headed' is used to describe a centre half who's a borderline psychopath and 'rash challenge' to illustrate a tackle that away from the football pitch would be classified as aggravated assault. When it comes bad officials, you'll often see the word 'controversial' liberally applied or one of its many synonyms used instead.

With that out of the way it's on to the match report itself, and apropos of nothing in particular, Mossley crashed to a sixth successive defeat in a game that will long be remembered for a series of extremely controversial decisions rather than the football played.

(See, that long preamble wasn't for no good reason at all. I don't just chuck these things together willy-nilly you know)

As this isn't the official match report though I'll quite happily tell you that some of the officiating in this game was absolutely appalling, culminating in two dismissals that turned what should have been a good finish to a game of football ended into something approaching a West End farce.

Regular readers will know I'm not one for criticising officials in these things as you tend to find that no matter how strange and aggravating some decisions are, they're rarely the sole reason for a defeat. Suffice to say however, if the paths of Mossley and the referee in this game never cross again it will be a hundred years too soon. More about those decisions later.

The match started like so many others have done recently with Mossley under pressure right from the kick off, and it took their opponents no more than three minutes to put the ball in the back of Ashley Connor's net; Kelsey taking advantage of some non-existent marking to control and power home a right wing cross from just outside the corner of the six yard box.

Ossett's second arrived in a similar fashion seventeen minutes later, Kelsey this time turning provider with a low cross from the left wing which Catton tapped home from close range under no pressure.

S-s-s-s-s-scramble!

Both goals sandwiched a host of other openings and opportunities that presented themselves to the home side and to be brutally honest we could have easily been four or five goals down before the midway point of the first half had been reached. However, just when it appeared that it was going to be another match that had the Mossley supporters wishing they'd brought their abacuses to keep a tally of the score, something unexpected happened. Not only did the visitors stem the flow of Ossett attacks but they began to look the better side.

Chances slowly started to present themselves to the Lilywhites as play became increasingly confined to the half the Albion were defending. Gareth Hamlet, Paul Garvey and David Boardman all went close to reducing the deficit as their once confident opponents began to wobble ever so slightly.

With time running out in the opening period it looked like Mossley weren't going to get the reward their belated efforts warranted but right on the stroke of half time they halved the arrears. Picking up the ball after his shot rebounded off the post, Paul Garvey laid the ball back to Daryl Weston on the right hand side of the Albion box. The Lilywhites full back then fired in a looping cross directly onto the head of Gareth Hamlet, who in turn directed the ball past the outstretched arm of the Ossett goalkeeper.

The second half began with Kelsey flashing the ball across the face of Mossley's goal, but the longer the match wore on, the more the visitors began to exert a tighter grip on the game. However the increase in possession failed to translate into an increase in shots on Albion's goal. With this in mind it's hard to argue that Mossley would have definitely salvaged the game had the following events not happened but it does make for an interesting "What if?"

Yes, you've reached that point in the report where it's time to talk about those disputable decisions I alluded to earlier.

In the 71st minute Daryl Weston was shown a straight red for an innocuous looking tackle on the halfway line. Not only did he win the ball, he did so without coming close to touching his opponent yet the referee couldn't get his card out fast enough to send him from the pitch. He was then immediately followed by manager Gerry Quinn for vehemently displaying his disbelief at the decision to the referee. A disbelief that appeared to be equally shared by the Ossett players and management.

Ten minutes later things went from the crazy to the utterly ludicrous. Gareth Hamlet became the second Mossley player to be issued with his marching orders after receiving a second yellow card for the strength of his protestations at the awarding of his first booking. There's no excuse for dissent but his reaction was somewhat understandable considering that he'd initially been cautioned for a volley of verbal abuse that had been directed at a linesman by an Ossett player.

It was at this point, with the game slowly slipping into the realms of the bizarre that I wondered if we weren't being set-up for one of those hidden camera TV shows; the kind were a celebrity whose status is defined by a letter at the bottom end of the alphabet suddenly appears and tells you that it was all a joke. Sadly, as Gareth Hamlet was 'helped' off the pitch by a contingent who hadn't been sent from the visitors bench, it was all to real.


Despite being at a numerical disadvantage for the closing stages of the game it was Mossley that finished the match in the ascendency, so much so that for the final ten minutes the crowd were treated to the sight of a team with ambitions of making the play-offs, playing for time against nine men. Sadly the lack of a decent final ball when they got into dangerous areas meant that a famous comeback remained elusively out of reach.

Now that the dust has settled on the events at the Queens Terrace ground, the fact remains that, unlucky or not, it's yet another defeat for Mossley. Even though it was one of the better performances we've seen in recent times but with the news that relegation is once again back on the agenda for one unlucky club, we need the win that will make us mathematically safe.

Admittedly, after having seen them play recently, it's highly unlikely that Woodley will get the seven points needed to go above us (even if they had fifteen games left let alone three) but it would be nice to see Mossley cement their place in the Unibond without relying on the continuing misfortunes of our near neighbours.

Only Four More To Go...

It’s to Yorkshire we head once more as the penultimate away fixture of the season sees us make the relatively short hop once again to Ossett.

Thanks to the ludicrous set-up of the league this season, this will be our third league meeting with the town’s lower ranked team. Honours from the previous two games are evenly shared with both sides winning their respective home games. The aggregate score from these meetings currently stand at 5 – 5 though Mossley are winning on the away goals rule.

The last match at Dimple Wells saw the home side run out 4 – 2 winners. Hopefully the scorer of Osset’s first goal on that night will be able to repeat the feat again this time around seeing as he now plays for us; the ‘he’ in question being David Boardman.

A run of eight games without defeat has taken our opponents to sixth position but they need a win to keep their still faint hopes of playing at least one extra game at the end of the season alive. Mossley on the other hand just need a win – be it scrappy, fortuitous or deserved. To be honest a draw would do and even a 1 – 0 defeat would be a sign of improvement.

Prediction: As always with Mossley – expect the unexpected. So with no-one expecting us to win that’s just what we’ll do, leading to three very welcome points heading back to Seel Park.

Woodley S 1 - 1 Bridlington Town

The inevitable postponement of Mossley's penultimate home match of the season after almost twelve hours of non-stop rain, snow and sleet gave a handful of Mossley supporters the chance to see two of the Lilywhites opponents in the race for the wooden spoon battle it out.

Woodley vs. Bridlington - packing them in.

When Woodley took the lead in the 66th minute is was a tad against the run of play and by that I mean it was a travesty. Up till that point Bridlington had been the only side on show that looked like scoring. That they weren't the four or five goals ahead that they deserved to be was down to one thing - a complete inability to put the ball into the back of the net. If it wasn't for plastic grass you could have sworn you were at Seel Park.

So not only was Woodley's goal against the run of play, it was with their first real shot as well. The Bridlington keeper did well to turn a long range free kick onto the crossbar but whilst his teammates stood around thinking "Blimey, that was close", Farrell knocked home the loose ball before embarking on a celebration not befitting someone who's just scored a tap-in. As you can see for yourself:


The destination of the three points looked to have been sealed not long after when Town's tricky little left winger was quite rightly shown the red card for abusing the match official. He did have something of a point though in his exclamation of tosspot as the referee, for the second time in the game, had allowed play to continue despite an incredibly blatant foul committed on the edge of the Woodley box.

With time running out Town got their first bit of luck in the match. A harmless looking cross looked to have been headed clear by one of the two Woodley centre halves, only for the ball to bounce off the back of his central defensive partners head and fly into the net. A moment of pure comedy that I rather frustratingly failed to get any footage of.

A typical scene from this game: Town on the attack with the wounded in the background.

Before the match the consensus was that the best result for Mossley would be a Bridlington win but with Radcliffe's surprise victory at Skelmersdale, a draw turned out to be the better outcome.

I'll admit that there was some hesitation about attending this match as the previous games I've seen involving Woodley this year as a neutral have been poor. It was therefore something of a surprise to not only be entertained but witness the best game of football I've seen in well over a month. It would have been nice if that accolade had fallen to a match involving Mossley but you can't have everything.

A scene that didn't fail to emit a few comments from the small band of Mossley fans in attendance. Including an unrepeatable one about a refrigerator and a piece of meat.

Woodley have seen quite a few changes since their previous manager left. Not only is their not one recognisable face on their team, they also have a, how should I put it diplomatically, certain gusto in their approach to tackling. But least they're attempting to marry that steeliness with some decent passing football, a world away from the neck aching long ball of the previous regime.

As for Bridlington, a draw was the least they deserved from the match. Their approach play was excellent but their astonishing knack of wasting glorious chance after glorious chance is something that I hope they carry into next weeks game with Mossley. If we can find our shooting boots I think there's a good chance we could be in line for a point or three.

A rare moment caught for posterity: a Bridlington shot on target during the match against Woodley (ultimately ruled out for offside).

Coming Up: A Mossley Win

The silky Brazilian skills of Garforth Town (no, I couldn’t type that with a straight face) make their second appearance of the season at Seel Park this coming Saturday, as Mossley make another attempt to reverse their poor run of form.

And do you know what? I think we’ll do it. Of course there has to be a reason for such optimism and I'll explain why later.

Garforth are something of a paradox. If you click on their web site you’ll be bombarded with content detailing how they play football the right way, with skill and flair - "samba football". A quick glance at the fair play table tells a different story though. While it’s true to say that some referee’s may be over zealous with their officiating, you don’t find yourself second in the leagues bad boy table through sheer bad luck.
Across the various club forums of the Unibond North Town's 'rough and ready' approach has been heavily criticised, procuring them the kind of reputation that that would get Don King itching to represent them.

The Yorkshire side have already beaten us once this season, in the first game in fact, and were a hairs breadth away from beating us again back in November. It needed a last minute penalty scored by Danny Toronczak to rescue a point for the Lilywhites in a game that, for three quarters of it at least, Garforth never looked like losing.

Our opponents-to-be's league position of 8th may get some people fretting about the outcome of the match but appearances can be deceptive. While Simon Clifford's side may sit in the outer fringes of a play-off spot, the Miners are currently on a run of three games without a win - just like we are. Taking only away games into consideration they're four games without a win - erm, just like we are. Plus they haven't scored in the last two of those away games - we have! Ergo we'll win

Yes I know we're playing at home and we last kept a clean sheet 21 matches ago but its a straw and I'm going to clutch at it.

Prediction: As I’ve said already – a win, and a much needed win at that, for Mossley. Along with a considerable number of yellow cards being flashed in our opponents direction. And as well as a third consecutive sentence beginning with the letter 'a', here's another prediction: Mossley's goals against column in the league won't tick into three figures.

Now I'm off to get treatment for the heavy blow I received to the head prior to writing this preview.

Mossley 0 - 4 Harrogate R.A.

Before I begin, let me emit a hearty sigh, ... , that's better.

With the unofficial news last week that there will be no relegation from the Unibond First Division North due to Newcastle Blue Star's decision to withdraw from the league, the possibility of Mossley's season going from bad to catastrophic looks unlikely to come to fruition.

It still however remains on course to go from bad to worse to even worse; the latest stop on that journey being a crushing 4 - 0 defeat at home to the team immediately above them in the table. A scoreline that Mossley could have no complaints about even if Harrogate's winning margin had been double what it was at the end of the match.


The visitors first goal in the 20th minute came as little surprise as they'd spent the majority of the preceding 19 minutes peppering the Park End goal Mossley were defending with shots. A move down Mossley's right hand side looked to have come to nothing when two Harrogate players got in each others way attempting to control ball. With no challenges forthcoming from the home defence though, they were able to untangle themselves and Carl Fox was allowed the time to turn on the edge of the box and fire a shot past Ashley Connor.

Mossley finally managed to break the almost incessant cycle of Harrogate attacks just after the half hour mark and with their one notable move of the half they put the ball in the back of their opponents net. Unfortunately the finishing touch applied by Gareth Hamlet was done so from an offside position, and with the goal ruled out 'normal service' resumed.

Just one video for your viewing 'pleasure' this week – Mossley's disallowed goal:

Just when it looked though like Mossley would make it to the interval only a goal in arrears, Railway doubled their lead. In the final minute of the half Scott Ryan took advantage of the inordinate being afforded to him to cut in from the left hand touchline and slip the ball under Connor. There was still time left in the half as well for Harrogate themselves to have a goal ruled out for offside.

The terraces weren't awash with much optimism at the start of the second period that Mossley could claw their way back into the game. What little there was though was pinned on the hope that with the wind at their backs, the Lilywhites would pose more of a threat as an attacking force. And whilst it's true to say that they enjoyed more possession than they had done in the opening half, there was little constructive done with it. In fact it wasn't until the 67th minute that Harrogate's keeper into action for the first time, Tom Morgan dropping low to his right to keep out a header from David Boardman.


Harrogate's response was to almost immediately break up field and with little in the way of a defence to stop him, Matthew James killed off Mossley's lingering hopes of salvaging anything from the match by netting his sides third.

Bizarrely this appeared to be the cue for Mossley to embark on their best spell of the game and for the first time in the match they actually made their opponents sweat a little. Lee Blackshaw almost pulled a goal back with a terrific shot that hammered off the underside of the cross bar and a long range effort by Leon Henry was plucked out of the air by Morgan. The brief attempt at a revival came to an end when Harrogate once again caught Mossley flat footed at the back and a strike from substitute Chris Rosindale took his sides total to four and the number of goals conceded by the Lilywhites in all competitions this season into three figures.

The remainder of the game was almost exclusively played out in the Mossley half of the field and if not for some more fine saves by Connor and a goal line clearance by Danny Ryan, the eventual result would have been even more emphatic.

Apart from the continued efforts of a few players and the return to action of Paul Garvey after a long injury lay off, the only positive to be taken from the game, other than that the margin of defeat being only four goals, is that what has been a wretched second half of the season is ninety minutes nearer finishing.


I don't think it would take more than two guesses to work out the kind of enthusiasm with which I approached the writing of this match report. I mean, how on earth do you put a new a spin on the latest in a long line of capitulations stretching back to the start of the year?

But for some good goalkeeping and some less than accurate finishing (I really should assign a keyboard shortcut to that phrase given the number of times I've used it this season) we would have been on the end of a much heavier, and frankly more realistic, defeat. The problems in this game were the same as the ones in the last match, the one before that and so on, so I hope you don't mind if I don't repeat myself for the umpteenth since the end of 2007.

A photograph of some snow taken during the second half. Why? Because there was little worth snapping on the pitch.

While it's true that we're still lucky to have a club at all to support this season following our mid-season dalliance with oblivion, the truth is that more results and performances like this one will only bring the wolves to the door once more as interest among those still bothering to attend dwindles further.

The saddest aspect of this match is that despite the low attendance, there were a few faces amongst the crowd that haven't been Seel Park for quite a while. And following the display they witnessed I'll wager that it'll be some time before we see them again.

As it stands we now have four games left in this campaign to reclaim a bit of pride and build a springboard into next season. Can we do it? Eternal optimists and those who believe five points out of forty eight is merely an unavoidable blip will say yes. But I'm confident they'd baulk from putting money on it.

Oh well, I'm sure it will be better next week when Garforth Town show up.

Overcrowding Not Expected

All five of Mossley's final games this season are against clubs from the White Rose county and they begin with the arrival of Harrogate Railway Athletic this Saturday.

This will be our third league meeting with Railway in the 07/08 campaign and the Yorkshire sides first ever visit to the hilltop away side only points dispenser fortress that is Seel Park.

The first match saw both sides share the points in a 1 - 1 draw, but it was different outcome in January when it was only a succession of poor finishing by numerous Harrogate players that stopped the Yorkshire club from racking up a more convincing win than the 2 - 1 scoreline they ended up with.

Harrogate's recent form has been up and down whist ours has mostly been the latter. That said, Railway still remain one of the few clubs we can realistically hope of overtaking in the pursuit of a better league position come the end of April.

Prediction: We've drawn with them once this season, we've lost to them once this season. The third game will see us complete the set with a win. Trust me - I'm right about this one.

Tumbleweed Wednesday

No midweek football means that, once again, I'm relying on the work of others to to keep the blog ticking over by listing a few links that you may find interesting.

It's no secret that Mossley are having a few problems on the pitch at the moment, particularly in regards to scoring and defending them. Thankfully though it hasn't got quite this bad:





Laurel and Hardy were great weren't they? There wasn't an occupation that was around in the early part of the last century that they couldn't mine for comedy - boat painters, car mechanics, piano movers and, memorably, the Foreign Legion.

One notable exception though was firefighting but now, thanks to two US firemen (albeit unwittingly), you can get a taster of what it would have been like had Hal Roach allowed Stan and Ollie to make a film that would probably have had 'blaze' in the title:



Have you ever bought some food purely on how it looks on the packet, only to find out that what's inside the packaging doesn't even come close to resembling the on the front? Well you're not alone (presuming you answered yes) because someone has gone to the trouble of detailing the discrepancies with photographs: Advertising vs Reality

My particular favourite is Grunkhol (about a third of the way down the page) as instead of a plate of food, it looks suspiciously like a grass verge that's popular with the local canine community.

Finally, a financial forum may be one of the last places you'd think of visiting for a really good laugh but I highly recommend reading this thread at MoneySavings Expert.com, as it details a fraud victims dealings with debt collection agency Debitas. Particular highlights from the many phone transcripts with call centre staff listed include the aforementioned victim pretending to be god and, in one inspired exchange, to have travelled two months back in time.

Hopefully there are one two things here that will keep you occupied for a few minutes while we await the arrival of Harrogate Railway Athletic.